CHS Class of 86

jnichel wrote:I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's not worth getting upset over your actions in someone else's suicide. It's not your fault, and you're not to blame in any way, shape or form.

I agree with you there John.

Shane, Thanks for sharing. I met Michael for the first time in the spring of 8th grade and I said something about God and looked at me with great confidence and said he didn't believe in God. It made in an impression on me because he was the first person I ever met who confidently stated he was an atheist. Perhaps this is another sign the he was in an unsure place spiritually.

Thanks for sharing such personal information.

Madonna Toney Giacona

JohnN. thanks for sharing that. I can't comprehend how difficult that must have been.

ShaneB. thanks for sharing that about MW. I look forward to talking to you about that more at the reunion.

I didn't know Michael Webb. Sounds like a wonderful guy.

I work with a a girl who is absolutely one of the nicest persons I have met in my entire life. It humbles me to be in her presence at times. Unfortunately, she lost her younger brother to suicide about 10 years ago. She particpaited in an overnight walk in Chicago in August for the prevention of suicide. They have one every year - check out www.theovernight.org. It is put on by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. www.afsp.org. I have to tell you, she was literally glowing when she came back from the walk in Chicago.

I don't know if this will help you or not, but for those of you who have had the terrible experience of losing someone you loved to suicide, I thought I should at least put this information out there.

Reading this forum brought back a flood of memories. I was not in your class, but I was friends with Michael and good friends with his girlfriend Heather.

I remember Michael calling me several times that weekend asking me to come to his party. I had already made a commitment to babysit and told him I couldn't go. How I wish I had changed my plans.

I remember hearing the rumors before school started and then getting comfirmation in class. I believe it was Dionne that came into class and told the teacher. I remember leaving school and calling Heather who had already moved.

I remember the service. The First Baptist Church was packed. Miss Webb was at the door as I was leaving. My mother touched my arm and said she was asking for me. The look in her eyes was devestating. As a mother now, I can somewhat understand.

If memory serves me right, Heather came to school a day or two later. She and I and I think another person went to clean out his locker. I will never forget that. When the locker was opened, on the locker door in peel and stick letters was 'God or Devil?'. As an adult, I look back and think how could that be missed?

I ran into his mother on several occasions after that. The last I remember she and David had reviewed the reports and decided it was an accident. Perhaps it was.

How blessed we all have been to have known him. Michael was a thoughtful, caring person with a Mother with boundless love and devotion.

Amy Hogsett Vickers

Reading about everyone's relationship with Michael and the unspeakable experience we all had to endure in 9th grade has brought me back to Covington like no reunion could. Although he has left an indelible mark on my life, I think about Michael rarely these days. As I try to relive those events over 20 years ago, I find that my memory is completely fragmented, as that of any traumatic event is bound to be. I remember receiving the news of Michael's death as a rumor, and reacting with skepticism. When the official announcements were made and it seemed to be true, I remember wondering WHY?? I remember hanging out with Leslie Jordan, another friend who was angry and devastated. I remember only flashes of the memorial service: Heather sobbing uncontrollably, tear-stained faces, the haggard and disheveled visage of Mrs. Webb as she cupped my face in her hands and told me, "He loved you."

I didn't know Michael all that well, although I considered him a good friend. During his last weeks of life, I know he tried to settle things with me which somehow weighed on his mind. On a school canoe trip earlier that year, he and Shane Bazer preyed on my arachnophobia, flicking spiders into my canoe and causing me to capsize. There were other harmless boyish pranks, which I really didn't mind. But I remember that Michael apologized for these things pointedly. He also gave me a gift, which, at the time, I thought was odd, but I accepted it with some surprise - colored acrylic box with my name printed on it. I now see those gestures as signs that he was envisioning an end, that he was not impetuous. I never saw a side of Michael that suggested the stereotypical brooding, alienated and miserable adolescent who would consider suicide. Perhaps he was motivated in a more rational existential way. I've stopped speculating now. But I can't escape the fear he has left me with: that if someone surrounded by so many friends and so much love who seems to have it all can still succumb to feelings of despair, how can I ever keep my children and my family safe?

Oh boy, this does bring back a lot of memories. I didn't go to school with Michael, because I was at Northlake during those years, but I knew him through various mutual friends. I can remember any number of late nights playing Risk at John von Rosenberg's house with Michael. I do remember rather vividly the day his suicide was reported. I found out after school and was stunned. It certainly caught me off guard, but in retrospect, I wasn't completely surprised.

I actually knew Michael's older brother David a little better, because I worked with him at my dad's animal hospital. I can remember talking through things with David at work on Saturday mornings. It was rather hard on him, because I think he saw it coming. I know Michael had mentioned it to him before. I seem to recall that David even intimated to me that he thought the last party was sort of an intentional good bye for Michael, although it was formerly for his girlfriend. It is hard for me to understand, but like Tina, I think Michael planned his death. Somehow I don't think it was about despair, or depression, but in a bazarre way it may have been about attention.

I finally got my scanner working with good ole' Vista, and was able to scan this. We received these the day Michael's fountain at the park was dedicated.

Thanks Julie for posting. BEAUTIFUL.